I've been playing with my balance lately and discovered how easy it is to fall, especially when it comes to my diet. I fell off the deep end with half of a medium sized Papa John's Garden pizza (more cheese and white flour than I've consumed in months). I couldn't sleep- heart racing, cold sweats, scattered thoughts. I was miserable! I had a pizza hangover the next day. In college, half a pizza, a six pack of beer, and half a pack of smokes were a regular part of my diet and my body surrendered to this pattern. Now, my mind and body revolts!
Thank goodness I had my green juice to fall back on the next morning. Since experimenting with a juice fast, becoming vegetarian, and adopting other healthy habits (dry brushing, tongue scraping, neti potting), I am comfortable with giving my stomach a rest in the morning. I used to throw food in my mouth as soon as my feet hit the ground in the morning. Now, I'm ok with waiting until noon to eat if I don't feel ready, although I usually drink my juice around 10am.
I am also finding balance in my yoga practice. For a few months following my stay at the ashram, I was putting all of my energy into teaching and ignoring my personal practice. Over the past month, I have found new joy and confidence in my personal practice. I've also taken it up a notch and I am working my way toward the handstand. This is a pose that my mind tries to tell me that I cannot accomplish, but I am ignoring those thoughts and focusing on the handstand a few minutes each day. It was the same situation when I approached the headstand. My body simply did not have the strength at first, but everyday I tried to get a step further in the pose, until eventually it just happened. I feel as fulfilled by achieving this pose as I do about getting my Master's degree. It taught me that I can achieve things that my mind perceives as impossible and that is priceless.
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